Wednesday, November 29th

What can I even say about my life lately?! Showers are optional. Cleaning is but a memory. And blogging?  I remember when I used to do that back in those days before I decided to go to school with a baby. Life has been so busy. School, Halloween, Thanksgiving, photo shoots, wedding, school, baby, boys, school, sickness, field observations for school, weddings, presidential elections, and lots of school. I think my problem is that I’m not very good at managing my time. I’d always rather not be doing school. I have some big papers due by the end of this week and next week. I don’t like these papers. I don’t like that I don’t have time to do anything that I want to do. I have gone 4 days in row without doing my makeup. That’s unheard of for me. I’ve gone to Walmart looking homely. I am doing what I can to get by, and I feel like I’m barely getting by. You know those interview questions you get asked, like, Do you work well under pressure? And you imagine to yourself that you do. And then you start working under pressure and realize that you lied right through your teeth when you said that you worked well under pressure. Well that’s me. I thought I worked well under pressure, but I DO NOT. I tell ya, I have prayed my way through this semester. I’ve worked too, I’m not just praying without working, but I really feel like my meager little efforts have been stretched to where they need to be thanks to some fervent prayers. Only 2 1/2 more weeks and the semester is over. Surely the angels will sing on that glorious day.

I wish that I could catch up on everything now. But it’s oh so late, and I haven’t slept for 8 hours for weeks. Joe is getting married on Friday. I have so much school to do tomorrow because I won’t be able to do anything on Friday. Saturday is busy because I have a photo shoot in the morning, a birthday party in the afternoon, and Jacob’s work Christmas party in the evening. So all of my school for the week has to be finished tomorrow. Jacob has school to do as well which is probably why our schedule has been so hectic this semester. And I haven’t journaled all the important and meaningful moments that have flown by. I feel like a failure. There are so many projects I need to do around my house. My Christmas tree is up, but I don’t have time to decorate it. I need to take baby Cooper from Becca for a night so that she and Juddy can have one restful night together before they lose their minds. I haven’t finished editing my brother’s wedding from 1 month and 3 days ago. I’m drowning! I have gone straight to bed so many nights at 2 am, falling onto my pillow without praying or reading or falling asleep while praying. I hate feeling like I am accomplishing so little in my life. My children are neglected and hungry. I have had clean clothes sitting in laundry baskets for days, and they come out so wrinkled that they have to be washed again because I don’t have time to iron. Teagan has been watching so much TV lately while Easton is at school and I’m on the computer doing school or trying to do everything else but pay attention to my children. I just don’t know how to do so many things at once. Next semester I registered for the biology class I need, but I just don’t think that it is the best thing for our family for Jacob and I to both be in school at the same time. And right now it’s more important that he finishes school. My children need my attention, and I’m just not capable of doing so many things at one time. I like that quote that if you don’t have time to pray and read your scriptures that you are busier than God intended you to be. That talk good, better, best also comes to my mind. It’s good to go to school, but it’s probably best to do it at a time when my family won’t suffer because of it.

Oh, and just a couple quotes to jot down.

Nov 8th

Me to the boys tonight: "UGH!!! Why are you guys being so bad lately?!!"
Easton: "Mom, we are learning a lot of new things in this world right now, and it's awkward for us, but we'll get the hang of it."

Oct 31st

Easton's prayers tonight: "And my mom is the most most most nicest, and I will never forget it, even when I'm an adult, and I will remember that my mom is who I love the most, even more than my own wife."

Wednesday, November 15th

Where have I been? Just stuck here at my computer desk, reading textbooks, taking quizzes, and going crazy. Only 4 more weeks of school until I have my life back. Thank the heavens! I am backed up on photo editing from Adam’s wedding and a friend’s family session last Saturday. I have a few more sessions coming up this month, so I will continue to be busy. I have not even done my hair or makeup since Sunday. I look catastrophic. But I have cleaned, and I have cooked dinner, and I have taken care of my children all the while managing to keep my head just above the water to get my school work done.  I am not superwoman, and it shows with my 3-day pajama ensemble and makeup-less face. How my husband has managed to look me in the face this week is beyond me.

Jacob took the boys to their first UNLV basketball game on Monday with Juddy and Andrea’s little boys Jackson and her husband Joey. I know some other of Juddy’s peeps were there, so the boys got to enjoy their man night. They loved it, and they looked so cute and excited as they were heading out the door.

Last Saturday, the 10th, we took the boys to the air show at Nellis Air Force Base. We spent about 4 hours browsing around the planes and jets, spending money on over-priced food, and watching all the air shows. It was absolutely FREEZING that day. I’m talking get-your-long-johns-out kind of freezing. But we were not prepared and only had little sweaters with us, although I did see some children wearing shorts and applauded myself for not being THOSE parents. The boys whined for about the last 2 hours that they were frozen to the bone, but we made them suffer through bone-chilling wind to watch this show that only happens once a year. They had fun, got to ride on a bus to get out to the base (we coulda just ridden the bus and called it a day with how much they loved it), got to go inside some big airplanes, eat some snacks, pee in a port-a-poddy, and spend some really cold quality time with their family. I dropped Logan off to my mom before we headed out there because I figured it would be too loud but didn’t even consider that it would be too cold.

Logan has been so stinking adorable, I don’t know what to do with how much I love him! He’s been so much happier and will actually sit and play on the floor or in his walker. Love that little boy! And I love walking into his room and seeing his sweet face after a nap. Always a smile for mama.

Thursday, November 1st

Well good heavens, it has been a while.  I’ve already mentioned how much I hate to miss my regular blogging, but this is all I can do to stay afloat right now. I am in awe of people who do so many things all at once. Like my awesome cousin Trish who is a nurse, a photographer, a mom, a gym instructor, and just finished getting her masters in nursing. All while being the mother of 3 small children. I take 3 classes, and suddenly I can’t do anything else in my life. But I’ll stop there at the comparisons, because I am who I am and I do my best with what I’ve got to work with, and that’s just little ol’ me.

This past week was quite busy. Our accelerated classes started, and it is unwise to do accelerated classes because you are cramming all of your work into 8 weeks instead of 16. I’ll remind myself of this the next time I enroll. Jacob and I read our butts off this week, and it’s hard to read about things that you don’t particularly care about. I don’t think there was a day last week that our noses weren’t glued to a textbook.

I also spent Thursday, the 25th, helping in Easton’s class, and then I had to help Amber set things up for her wedding. I was gone most of that day while Jacob was home trying to do all of his school work and take care of 3 children, one of which tends to be particularly fussy. He’s a good husband, that Jacob of mine. He never complains that he has too much to do when I leave him for a day. Then Friday was Adam’s and Amber’s wedding. I left for that around 12:30 to help set up and take pictures of Amber getting ready. Their wedding was beautiful, and it was so much fun. Becca and I got out and danced a bit with my dad’s family. I have lots of good pictures to post, and I will get to that soon, but there are a lot of pictures to edit. Jacob left earlier than I did to get the boys to sleep, and I got home around 10pm. That was another long day, but it really was a lot of fun, and the food was good. Non-Mormon receptions are far more exciting than Mormon ones because Mormon receptions never have enough dancing. Adam and Amber are not Mormons, so there was dancing. And a good sit-down dinner. I appreciated those two things.

Logan was so fussy the past week, and I discovered probably on Monday that his first tooth is FINALLY starting to poke through. I can actually see the top of it trying to make it’s way out of his gums. So maybe that has something to do with his fussiness. Easton and Teagan were never fussy when they teethed, so I’ve always assumed that whole fussy when teething idea was a myth made up by parents who needed something to blame their baby’s crying on. But maybe I’m a believer now.

This week has been more school and more mom stuff. Yesterday was Halloween, and we went over to Colleen’s house to eat soup and trick-or-treat with Sadie. My parents came and trick-or-treated with the kids for a bit, but my dad couldn’t last too long with his walker. Jacob’s parents joined my dad at Colleen’s house while the rest of us were out, so we spent some more time back at Colleen’s after the kids were done trick-or-treating, which wasn’t very much longer after we started. They kept whining that their legs were tired and they already had too much candy. Kids these days. Can’t appreciate a bucket overflowing with candy. We had such a great evening. Anthony, Geana, and Jaedyn showed up after we were done trick-or-treating so that the kids could all see each other. I love that we can get together with my family, Juddy’s family, and Jacob’s family and all have a really great time together.

Today Jacob and I did more school, went and voted in the presidential election (for Romney so that we can get Obamacare out of here), and then Jacob dropped me off at the hospital where Becca was being induced to have sweet little Cooper. She was a 4 at her appointment this morning, so her doctor sent her over to the hospital since she’s been contracting so regularly. They gave her pitocin at 2pm, and Cooper James arrived at 8:30pm after an awesome labor. Her epidural left her with more feeling this time, which she really liked because she could feel her body needing to push and was able to control the pushing this time. It was a lot of discomfort once she suddenly had the urge to push. She kept saying, “I swear I just pooped on the bed.” It’s crazy that it feels just like that once that pushy feeling comes. Trying to stop your body from pushing is a horrible feeling, and she felt that this time since her epidural wasn’t as strong as it was with Sadie. Her doctor wasn’t there when she suddenly said, “I feel something, it feels like something is coming out, and my body feels like it is just pushing all on its own.” So she had to try to stop herself from pushing until her doctor got there, which was about 15 minutes after she started feeling that urge. I think that’s why Teagan’s was so intense – I had that pushy feeling for about 25 minutes and the nurses kept telling me to hold the baby in until finally he came out without my doctor there but luckily delivered by a doctor who was just passing by in the hallway. Anyway, back to Becca. Once her doctor arrived, she pushed 3 quick times, and Cooper was here weighing in at 6lbs 12oz and measuring 20 1/4 inches long. He is such a darling little thing! My parents were there and so was Colleen, so we had a nice time chatting with each other and waiting for baby Cooper. I got home by 10pm, and Jacob had the boys in bed and the house all put together. Love me some Jacob.